Intuition: your best moving guide
by Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D.
Recently someone asked me, "What coaching tools do you
use?"
"Tools?" I asked, bewildered. "I avoid tests and
assessments."
"No," she explained. "Listening skills?"
Well, I suppose I listen -- but I mostly listen to my own intuition.
And I encourage clients to do the same.
Since I derive most of my life lessons from reading murder
mysteries, I am reminded of a recent book by Marcia Muller:
Listen to the silence. The heroine, Sharon McCone, turns
her prodigious investigative talent to researching her own background.
As she interviews family members, her significant other, also
a heavy-duty detective, says, "Listen to the silence."
He meant, "When someone answers a question, don't just
listen to what's said. Listen for the pauses, the silences in
what they say."
As I listen to clients, I've decided that we need to listen
to the messages sent by our bodies, our friends and family, and
what some would call "the universe" -- our environment.
As business people, we need to listen to our customers. We need
to listen with great skepticism to advice.
While this idea may seem a little woo-wooish, here's an example.
One day I received an email from a web designer who had landed
on my website.
"You need help, desperately," she said. "Everything's
wrong!"
Something didn't feel right about the message. Intuition works
with knowledge, and I've learned to be skeptical of unsolicited
guidance or advice. "You get what you pay for" tends
to be all too true. So I thanked her politely and continued with
business as usual. And I listened to clients who weren't web
designers but who did like the site.
One day I applied for an affiliate program with a noted web
designer -- someone who's often chosen to serve as a judge for
web awards and contests.
"Interesting site," she said.
"Gee," I said, "everybody loves my site except
designers and marketers."
"Ignore them," she said. "Your site's just
fine. I should know."
This validation (vindication?) is rare, but reminded me that
the best support systems encourage us to listen to our own world
-- not their words. If you're researching a new career, and you
get only negative messages, you need to pay attention.
Considering a move to a new location and find yourself feeling
like, "I don't belong here?" Going to a big job interview
and feeling that everything you say is coming out all wrong?
Well, there's a reason.
There are times to heed well-meaning, unsolicited advice.
When Tony Soprano says, "This game isn't for you,"
pay attention. When the police officer says, "Slow it down,"
that's a good idea too. But most of the time, listen for subtle
messages from whatever crosses your path.
That's your own intuitive code. And don't let any words get
in the way of the real message.
Learn to crack
your own intuitive code.
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Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D. is an author, career coach, and speaker.
She can help you rebuild, renovate and revitalize your career.
Visit her site http://www.movinglady.com or call 505-534-4294.
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